"Other things may change us, but we start and end with family." (-Anthony Brandt)

This past weekend, I went up to Cambridge, Massachusetts to visit my son. His wife was traveling, so I didn’t get to see her, but as always, it was really pleasant to spend a few days with Eric. They live in a high rise that looks out over a verdant urban park, which pleases me to know that he has at least some semblance of Nature close by!

When we talked a few weeks ago, and I said that I would come up to visit, he said that he was going to make dinner reservations, so I asked him not to go to any special trouble for my visit.

His sarcastic reply, typical of Eric, was:

“OK, well, right--we may water you, and we might let you out for some sunshine, but you’re right—we probably won’t plan on feeding you.”

(You would think that after 31 years, I would have anticipated such a reply.)

When I arrived, on my bed was a sweet card from his wife, a book about Boston, and this elegant box of chocolates to welcome me. Last year when I visited, he and I walked all over: to the Public Gardens in Boston, through Newberry St and all around town. We also spent a day at the DeCordova museum and sculpture gardens, which was right up my alley.

This visit, we had wonderful meals, ate outdoors, went to a creative, artsy shop that he knew I would enjoy, and just talked and relaxed. He watched as I tried, (and failed,) several times, to sketch my gift, but he offered encouragement as he always does.

And as usual, when he dropped me off at the airport, I welled up—I happen to be extremely sentimental when it comes to Eric. I will hear from him often in emails and phone calls, but I won’t see him again for some time, with my wacky work schedule, so I’ll cherish each visit and remember it with fondness.

“You don’t really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around—and why his parents will always wave back.” (-William D Tammeus)

“Do your kids a favor—don’t have any.” (-Robert Orben)

Any parent knows that in the final analysis, there’s no guarantee you’ll have Nice Kids. I'm one of the lucky ones.

My son Eric married a lovely girl from Bermuda, and they lived and worked there for several years. Now, they live in Cambridge, Massachusetts while his wife is back in school working on her PhD.

While he was growing up, I was the Queen of the Worriers. I was a single parent, so I was always agonizing over something: how I must be a bad parent, or how I couldn’t afford to do different things for him I'd have liked to do, or what he might wind up being like as an adult. There was always something to be concerned over. Eric always said he didn't worry, because he knew I did enough worrying for the two of us.

In some ways, Eric really raised me. I was a young mother, and I used to tell him, “You know, there’s no book telling me the right way to do this. We’re both learning how this all works.” He took everything in stride, and he was always thoughtful, sensitive and kind, even as a little kid. I often tell people, when I describe how pleasant he is now, that even if he weren’t my son, I would want him as a friend, and I mean that.

Now,…that said, I don’t want you getting the wrong impression. As much as I was the Stress Queen, he is the King of Sarcasm and Humor. He makes me laugh…always has.

Once, when he was very small, I was in my 20’s, and I had had a particularly tiring day, stressing out more than usual, and I said to him, “Eric, your mother’s getting old.” I suppose I was looking for some sort of comforting words. He looked up at me, and without blinking an eye, he nodded his head, and very matter-of-factly said: “Mmmm…soon, you’ll be dying!” with an almost cheerful lilt to it. He didn't seem remotely phased by that notion. He's made me laugh, and he's made me proud over the years. I love him very much.

“Families are like fudge—mostly sweet with a few nuts.” (author unknown)